The Moment

Time: 7:50 a.m.
Place: YourNewsChannel 3 a.k.a. my job

Sorry I've been A.W.O.L. once again the internet at my house got cut off. So here I am ignoring my responsibilities at work to blog. Raise your hand if you've done the same. Now if your hand is down...you are not pimping. But I come bearing gifts and not meaningless chatter. Gifts in the form of the random stuff I see during my travels in the streets of the 757. We'll start with the occasional trip to Wal-Mart. So I walk in the spot looking for somed deodorant and some garbage bags. Found both items successfully. So I head to the checkout line...try to sweet talk the cashier into letting me get the double pack of Old Spice for the price of one. Sadly it didn't work and I wasted some perfectly good game. As I'm fishing the well crumpled dollars out of my pocket, I look up and I see "The Moment". Allow me to explain. "The Moment" let's you know exactly what's going on around you at that exact moment. It's rawness and realness is poetry in motion. It's like watching a car wreck with glee instead of anguish. It...is...beautiful. My moment was watching two teens prepare to get their pictures taken at Wal-Mart. I can hear the grumblings you folks are screaming at your monitors..."What's wrong with that?" Well I'll tell you. They had on matching outfits complete with "hater-blockers". Hater blockers are those midnight tint sunglasses you see everyone wearing. Whether it's Young Jeezy rocking the Versace shades or you rocking the knock-offs (don't front). So there was Taquito and Knuck-Knuck rocking the hater blockers at the Wal-Mart photo booth. I had to bite my bottom lip to not laugh at them. I still have the teeth marks in my lip. That's how funny it was. But alas, I couldn't leave you with just one "The Moment". Of course I had to have two. This one happened at work. It was Friday. Usually on Friday's we get free bagels (the perks of television news). Mine of course was as hard as times in 1929. Nevertheless, I pressed on. So I'm sitting there eating my bagel when a producer I work with started playing this song. It was New Kids On The Block a.k.a. the white New Edition. So everyone that has a lack of melanin starts dancing and shaking their pancake asses. I sit there stunned and proceed to eat my stale cinnamon-raisin bagel. So the producer says to the director (who happens to be an older black guy) and myself, "See I got rhythm". I chuckle as does the director. Then, "The Moment" happens. Before I explain, let me give you a little background on the older black man. He's quite possibly the funniest creature on earth. Think back to all the family gatherings you've been to. Chances are the one you were either laughing at or with was the older black man. From Uncle Tony (the one who drinks cause he just got laid off...again) to Grandpa Amos (who can't stop talking about "dem gurls running around wit dey draws showin' ") they're at every bar-b-q, family reunion, wedding and graduation. But I'm getting sidetracked. So the old head (that's what I call them) gets up and says, "What you talking bout. Man I'm hip, I'm with it. I got grandkids who keep me up to date with everything." Finally, "The Moment" happens. Old Head says, "put some snap music on and see what happens." He then proceeds to get his snap on...as he leans with it AND rocks with it. I don't know enough adjectives to describe how funny that shit was and still is. All I can say is it was..."The Moment".