ATL...The Recap

After V hassled me, I figured it was time to reminisce about my time in the A. Forgive me if I leave a few details out, it was almost about two weeks ago.

Thursday
I went to the job to pick up my check so I would have some money available when I was in Atlanta. I went in there looking real suspect. Basketball shorts...wave cap...white tee and aviator sunglasses. Yeah I looked like The Unabomber. I went back to the house and finished packing. I had two bags. One for clothes and one for footwear. I was going down there on a mission. I went home and put on something respectable cause I know my Mom will talk about me getting off the plane looking like a bum. I throw on a black Lacoste polo, jeans, Timbs and my Swiss Army watch. Yeah, I'm fresh. I drove to my homegirl's place in Hampton so she could take me to the airport in Newport News, cause I'll be damned if I leave my car at the airport for longer than a few hours. So, I check in get my boarding pass and go on my way to my gate. I get to the gate, and start passing the time by reading. I highly suggest you guys read "The Pursuit Of Happyness". If a book is made into a movie, I always read the book first. I like painting the picture in my head better than watching it on screen. So I'm reading and I notice this chick. I think nothing of it until she stands up. MAN LISTEN...shorty's dad must have been a meat burglar because it looked like someone shoved two hams down the back of her pants. So now, I'm tuned in. I still keep it cool cause you know I'm just made that way. Eventually she sits back down and wouldn't you know it, she sits next to me. The minute she sat down I finished reading (I was really done) so I reached in my bookbag and pulled out my next book. Yeah, I get it in with the reading. This one was called "Nigger. The History Of A Strange And Troublesome Word". So I begin reading and shorty notices the title.

"Interesting book huh?"
"Yeah it is. Gotta keep the cover hidden though, I don't want to upset people."

She flashes a smile in agreement and continues reading her fashion magazine. I see the door of opportunity open.

"I mean this isn't as fascinating as what you have, but it'll do."

She smiles and turns towards me. Touchdown. She and I start talking. I find out she's a teacher in the area and that she's going to Atlanta just to unwind for a few days. I also find out she's recently divorced and that she has a child. Normally this would've been an automatic disqualification for me, but it's 2007 and people got kids. No need in eliminating a woman because she has a Mini-Me. I also find out she's older than me ( stop me if you've heard this before). But she's about three years past the new 20. We've been talking for about a half an hour when they start boarding. Now she starts getting antsy, but not because of anything I've said or done, but because she's flying standby and has been waiting since about noon. It's now 2:30. I wait until the very end to board. Looks like she's not getting on the flight. Before I get on the plane I ask for her number.

"Maybe when I get back we can go out to dinner."
"I'd like that."
"Cool. I'll hit you up when I get back."

I turn, walk onto the plane, find my seat and smile.

"This is gonna be a good weekend."

About an hour and a half later, I land and begin my trek to the baggage claim. Yo, for all you cats from Atlanta that knew I was going down there you get the middle finger. You knew how big that damn airport was! You couldn't warn a brother! Dead ass I walked 3,000 feet from the gate to the baggage claim. Yeah, I could've taken the little in-house subway to the baggage claim, but I didn't think 3,000 feet was that far. Consider my lesson learned. As I was making my way to the airport, I pass through some kind of African exhibit. This thing had sculptures...music...the whole nine. I felt real Lion King. So I make it through this journey and finally make it to the baggage claim. Can I just pause for the cause and say I saw some of the finest women in that damn airport? Ok cool. I get my bags and wait for my aunt and grandparents to pick me up. They come scoop me up and the laughter begins. My grandparents are old (Grandpa is 84 and Grandma is 81...I think) and hilarious. The whole ride from the airport to the hotel I'm listening to them talk about everything and Christian radio. Grandpa is a pastor. An active one. He still gets in that pulpit every Sunday morning and preaches. After sitting in that traffic for what seemed like all my adult life, we reach the hotel in Duluth. Grandma and Grandpa are diabetic, so they're on a strict eating regime. So we go to the local buffet (I swear the South has either a buffet or a Waffle House on each corner) and grub. I get down cause I ain't paying and I'm hungry. By the time we finish, my brother sends me a text saying he and my parents have made it. They drove from Ohio. So we load Grandma and Grandpa back into the car and go to the hotel. I hug my Mom, give my brother some dap and me and my Dad do our handshake. Yes we have a handshake...clown me and the back hand is waiting for you. We check into our rooms and let the family shenanigans begin. You know how in every hotel there's that one room that's set aside for corporate business meetings? The one at our hotel had been transformed into the reception room. A few long aluminum tins full of spaghetti kept warm over those portable burners...some salad...about 12 bottles of salad dressing...bottled water...soda...and of course chicken now decorate a table normally reserved for conducting serious business. We go in there and spark up conversation with the fam. Soon after that, a cousin announces that we'll be playing bingo. The winner gets a gift certificate to Wal-Mart. I tune in. $10 at Wal-Mart goes a long way. Naturally I don't win any of the bingo games, but my Dad does. I try and bribe him for the gift certificate but it doesn't work out. Now we switch games and we're playing "Name That Tune". Except for song titles, we have to guess what show's theme song is playing. So we pair up into teams, and it becomes my family versus a few other cousins. WE MASH EM! We beat them like 15-3. At one point they were trying to stop playing, but I insisted on still playing. I love to win, so I was all about keeping the foot on their necks. Finally they stop trying and we claim victory. I begin the trash talking. It was pretty bad. I get really obnoxious when I win, but hey I won so I'm allowed to do whatever I want. By this time it's pretty late and a few cousins are itching to go out and do something. I roll with them to some watering hole/pool hall. We have a few drinks. FYI...next time you go out get a Red Bull and Tuaca. Trust me, it's what you need in your life. I knock back two real quick.

"Damn, you drank them already?"
"I mean we drinkin ain't we? I play no games. This is what I do."

Not trying to look like the family wino, I fall back and let them nurse their drinks. Around 2 or 3 we had back to the hotel and I go to sleep. Gotta get my rest for the next day cause we're taking a tour of Atlanta...

Day Two tomorrow