Sexy Time!

I saw this on V's blog, who saw it on...everyone else's.

1. HAVE YOU GOTTEN LAID IN 2007?
Yes sir! But still I'm not satisfied...

2. EVER HAD SEX IN A PUBLIC PLACE?
Nah, but that is on the list though.

3. EVER LAUGH DURING SEX?
Yeah. I always say if you can't be good, be funny.

4. EVER CRY DURING SEX?
Uh no. The fuck is this "Lifetime"?

5. DO YOU LIKE TO CUDDLE AFTER SEX?
Depends who I'm with and the circumstances that led to us having sex. If you're wifey or have wifey potential, we're getting our snuggle on. But if you're some broad you get your half of the bed...no more, no less.

6. EVER REGRET SEX WITH SOMEONE?
Yeah...but I mean hey I was in a slump...

7. EVER FAKED AN ORGASM?
Nah

8. DIRTY TALK, OR SHUT THE FUCK UP?
I'm a talker...

9. EVER HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX?
***looks around the room uncomfortably and raises hand***

10. EVER MASTURBATE TO YOUR FRIEND'S SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
WOW! That's how we feel in 2007??!! No I haven't

11. EVER HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND?
Oh yeah. And each one is better than the previous one.

12. EVER WATCH PORN DURING SEX?
No, but I've had some suggestive music on. You pair that with my imagination and it's porn-like.

***WHY IS THERE NO NUMBER 13???***

14. EVER THOUGHT OF SOMEONE ELSE DURING SEX?
LOL...yeah. When I was a freshman in college, I had pictures of some half naked chicks on the ceiling above my bed. So one afternoon this chick comes through and we get it going. But I wasn't really digging her so "my man" wasn't getting with the program. So in order to get the job done, I had her get on top so I could focus on the chicks on the ceiling.

15. HAS THE CONDOM EVER BROKEN?
Yeah

16. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING SEXUAL EXPERIENCE?
I've already blogged about it. Search the archives bitches!!!

17. HOW OLD WERE YOU WHEN YOU LOST YOUR VIRGINITY?
13...no bullshit

18. WHO WOULD YOU LIKE TO HAVE SEX WITH RIGHT NOW?
This chick I just got off the phone with.

19. DO YOU THINK THAT #18 IS POSSIBLE?
With this face, anything is possible (LMAO...that shit sounded mad conceited!!!)
20. ARE YOU HORNY NOW?
Yeah, it's been a minute since I had some. I'm due.

21. HOW MANY SEXUAL PARTNERS?
Wait let me consult my list. And yes I have a real list of people I've had sex with. I write each one down with a name, date and description of the woman. ***looks at list***...between 25 and 30.

22. DO YOU LIKE SEX IN THE CAR?
It all depends on what kind of car. If you've got a Geo Metro, we ain't getting it poppin. I'm too tall for that shit. Now if you got like a Lexus truck, then we can talk.

23. DO YOU STILL TALK TO THE PERSON YOU LOST VIRGINITY TO?
Nah, haven't seen her since 7th grade.

24. EVER HAVE SEX WITH A RELATIVE/FRIEND'S SIGNIFICANT OTHER?
She wasn't his significant other, but they were really good friends.

25. EVER BEEN WITH A CHEATER?
I'm sure we all have. No one's perfect, right? ***looks around the room and realizes he's alone in thinking that***

26. TOYS, GOOD OR BAD?
Bad. I'm the star of the show, not some battery powered tounge.

27. LINGERIE?
It's nice to look at, but I mean at the end of the day it's gonna be in a crumpled heap somewhere in the bedroom.

28. EVER SLEEP WITH A CO-WORKER?
No, but I'm trying.

29. WHERE HAVE YOU HAD SEX?
(x) park
( ) church
( ) cemetery
( ) beach
(x) boat
( ) school
( ) parent's bed
(x) your bed
(x) car
(x) picnic table
( ) kitchen counter
(x) couch/chair
( ) dining room/kitchen table
(x) woods (open and/or in a tent)
( ) hood of a car
(x) bathroom
( ) shower
( ) bathtub
(x) the other person's bed
( ) porch/deck/balcony
( ) in a house with parents home
(x) at a party
( ) on top of the washer/dryer
( ) with other people in the room
(x) hotel
( ) concert
( ) grandparent's house
( ) field
( ) bleachers
( ) bookstore stock room
( ) linen closet

30. How many virgins have you "deflowered?"
Never had any rookies on the team.